Sick of it All
by Yawwii
Summary: After the apocalypse Dean goes back to Cassie for that normal life he's always wanted, leaving Sam in the field, only to find it's not what it's cracked up to be. Dean/Cassie, eventual Dean/Sam, hinted Cas/Gabriel. Rated T, may change.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Sick of it All.

Summary: After the apocalypse Dean went back to Cassie, finally getting that 'normal' life he'd always wanted, but never admitted to. Problem is, it's not as wonderful as it seems. This fic sees them and their life, post apocalypse.

A/N: Okay since I live in the UK I've only seen up to 5x13, so I know it will be a little off from there, since *some* people decide to *not* put spoiler warnings in their stories, but please bear with me.

Pairings: Dean/Cassie.

He knew it sucked to say it, but since the apocalypse was averted, Sam's life sucked.

He'd lost Bobby.

He'd lost Cas.

He'd lost his friends.

His life.

But by far the worst thing he'd lost was his brother.

Dean.

On the 16th April, 2010, at 16:04 pm Dean Winchester said yes to Michael the Archangel.

The memory was bitter to the younger Winchester's mind. But that was how it was documented in the 'Winchester gospels'.

Michael had taken the time from his busy schedule to come to Dean in the form of a 'temporary vessel' to pitch his sale.

Sam gets to live, Castiel gets appointed Archangel of Humanity and given a position to help other angels understand the human race, Bobby gets his legs back, they all get guaranteed spots in heaven along with everyone Dean has ever cared about, Dean's brain doesn't fry, and most importantly half the world doesn't get destroyed. How could Dean say no?

Well Sam wanted him to. Team free will was knocked down to one member as Dean agreed.

Castiel thanked him when it was over, and neither brother had seen him since. Bobby's legs turned to a curse when he was killed by a Wendigo on his first hunt back in the field. At the hunter's funeral Dean blamed himself.

Knowing he'd be going to heaven Sam started taking risks, not caring. He'd even drunk demon blood once when he needed it on a hunt. Dean had long since quit. It was ironic how Sam was the only Winchester left in the field.

Sam didn't even know why he'd disagreed. He just had a feeling it would go wrong, something wouldn't turn out right. Even when he was a kid he'd had those 'feelings', which were 98% right.

He put it down to Azazel's blood.

Sam left that night. He didn't want to see his brother again. Ever. But he did. And Dean knew it.

He called every day for 3 months before the calls started to peter out. First every other day, then every three days, soon it was just weekends, then every couple of weeks. The last voicemail (because he never picked up, just couldn't bring himself to face Dean or change his number) he'd received was at least 3 months ago, telling him Dean had given up hunting. For good.

As Sam downed the last dregs of his 15th tumbler of Jegermeister he mentally saluted. Have a nice life.

~*~3 years later~*~

He didn't know how, but Dean had found himself in Wisconsin. Something had drawn him there after his last hunt, and he only found out what a few months after he started renting a flat when he ran into Cassie.

Cassie. THE Cassie. The only girl he'd ever loved. And lost, twice.

Slowly they'd built up a relationship. She realised he meant it when he said he'd given up on hunting. Over the course of two years they'd dated, falling deeper in love than they ever had before.

Truthfully Cassie had never gotten over Dean, he was the main reason she was still single.

9 Months ago Cassie had moved into Dean's apartment, delicately adding feminine touches to it, making it a home for both of them. They threw a housewarming party, inviting all of Cassie's friends as well as the few Dean had managed to make in those first few months of living there.

Dean was blinded by love and willing to oblige any of her wishes. Cassie was blinded by jealousy of anyone who even came near her man, knowing of his previous promiscuity.

For a while they were happy together, the pink glow of finally getting his pie after so longer hadn't even began to leave Dean, but all too soon he started to see the effects of his compliancy.

It was little things at first, but quickly they snowballed, once he'd forgotten to pick up the dry cleaning;

'You didn't *tell* me we had any to be picked up!'

'What so I'm your mom now? I have to tell you to do *everything*?!'

'For crying out loud! What do we have that even *needs* dry cleaning anyway?! I'm a mechanic and you're a chef!'

'What so I can't have nice clothes because I downgraded employment, is that what you were trying to say?'

'*NO*! Why do keep twisting my words?!'

'That's it, I'm staying at Linda's tonight. Maybe she and Tony can talk some sense into you tomorrow!'

Dean soon learned that arguing for himself would only cause bigger fights. It was a slow process because he'd pretty much spent his entire life fighting fire with fire, and Cassie did not like to be reminded of that one bit. He quickly developed a passive personality, going from the life of the party to a bystander, agreeing with what she said, backing down if he'd 'done something wrong', cutting off friends because she said so. Heck he hadn't phoned his brother in nearly 3 years.

8 months after they started living together things had taken a turn for the worse. Cassie's friend had been posted to Afghanistan with Air Force. She'd known him since she was a kid, and he meant alot to her.

Dean took sympathy with her, but everything he said seemed to be wrong. He had no idea what it felt like to be without someone you care about. He had no idea what it was like to have someone who you've known your whole life, someone who you love, maybe more than you should, be constantly in the line of danger, their life hanging by a strand, getting weaker day by day. Obviously.

Soon they were fighting about everything, though fighting's not really the right word since that takes two people. Smaller even more insignificant things than before caused Cassie to blow up at him.

Their friends were sympathetic towards him, but mainly supported her, since she was 'going through a rough time'.

They were in another 'separation period'. Still together but Cassie spending the week or so at Linda's or couch surfing her female friends' houses. They'd had another fight.

About a week beforehand Dean had let his eyes wander to another woman. In truth he was just thinking. But Cassie called him on it anyway. It was 'a big issue'. That evening Dean had gone out with the guys to 'shoot the shit, get pissed, crash at Steve's to stop the girls complaining,' over all it was a good plan. Until at one bar they'd ran into Shirley, the ex of one of Dean's friends, who was luckily absent at that time. Last time he'd seen her, and this was while she was dating Michael (ironically one of Dean's best friends), she'd been all over him, hands everywhere, basically ignoring her boyfriend, and her behaviour didn't improve much when Cassie had arrived.

Needless to say she was public enemy #1 in Cassie's eyes.

Dean and Steve, who also knew Michael quite well, were talking quietly about her, when the relatively new guys to the group (Jules and Elliot) asked them what they were talking about.

"That girl over there." Dean motioned with his head, "We used to know her-,"

Unfortunately Jules took that moment to call her over with a 'Hey beautiful!', not knowing what he was doing.

She strutted over in her ridiculously high heeled, thigh length dom boots and hotpants, waggling her manicured-to-within-an-inch-of-it's-life-hand at them.

"Hey Dean!" She waved and giggled at him, blowing an air kiss. He fidgeted uncomfortably. She was trampy even for *him*.

"Uh. Hi."

"So you going to introduce me to your friends?" Shirley giggled again, batting her spide-...eyelashes at the other men. Thankfully for Dean Steve spoke this time.

"That's Jules, he'll sleep with anything that moves which is why he called your whore-ass over, that's Elliot, same applies to him, and you know who Dean and I are, and you've obviously met our lovely girlfriends who we're extremely devoted to."

Jules and Elliot were giving him weird looks but Dean smiled inwardly, inclining his head in thanks to Steve. He just wasn't that kind of person these days.

Shirley continued to smile like the Cheshire cat, practically purring when Jules touched her shoulder, while Dean and Steve left to go join the rest of the guys.

15 minutes later, after two more pits Chris insisted on buying him, Dean and Steve (who hadn't had any alcohol) left the bar and stood outside while Dean called his girlfriend.

"She said I can go back, but she was huffy about it. Probably looking forward to a night without me." Dean nervously laughed, but quietened when Steve gave him a funny look before turning away.

He could have sworn he heard Steve say 'You're losing yourself', but it was so quiet Dean put it down to the wind.

Sam Winchester sat in a dark bar drinking to himself. After nearly giving himself liver poisoning Sam started to control his alcohol intake. Tonight however was a special occasion. He was celebrating. The last demon (he had it on good authority) was vanquished. He was done. It had taken him three years, but he'd finally cleaned up the mess he'd made. Sure there were still crossroad demons, still ones in hell, but all who had escaped the hellgate, all who were topside because of *him* were gone. He pulled out his tattered old mobile phone. Hesitating slightly he found 'Dean' on the list and pressed call. He quickly hung up once he realised it was half 3 am. He'd call tomorrow.

A/N okay, basically, I know this is pretty damned AU, and will get even more AU as it goes on, but please review? Flames light my fire, and advice always helps ^^

Also do you even want me to continue, cuz if this is aload of Douchenozzle (^^) I'll stop here and now. Okay actually I wont I just won't upload it *cheesy grin*.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks to everyone who reviewed/subscribed/favourite =D and I'm really sorry about the long wait, I'd actually written this chapter ages ago, and I guess I thought it wasn't long enough or something...Well anyway yeah I'm not the sharpest crayon in the box, guess who decided to start this story right before all her exams? Smooth huh? Anyway I've found a way to shove Real-Life in a box for a while, in the form of study leave! Hopefully updates will be more frequent...

"Hey Cassie." Dean called out as he came in the door of their flat.

A very pissy looking Cassie stepped out from the kitchen, crossed arms and spread legs gave her an aura of authority, and Dean tried desperately to think of what he'd done wrong.

"Uhm. Sorry I came home tonight instead of tomorrow, we uh ran into Shirley..." Dean trailed off as Cassie visibly raised her hackles and narrowed her eyes.

"And. What did you do? And don't lie to me." Dean mentally sighed and shrugged, barely raised his shoulders before her pissy-ness increased tenfold.

"Oh, a shrug, well if that's what our relationship is worth to you then I suppose it doesn't matter you've spent the evening chatting up a slut." Cassie was calm, but the stone cold ice of her voice struck fear in Dean in a way that had never been accomplished by anyone other than Castiel, when he threatened Dean's position on earth.

"Cassie, baby, look you know I didn't mean it like that, I just avoided her, practically ignored her. Nothing happened I swear. You know I wouldn't do that to you... I love you."

The softness in both his eyes and his voice slowly melted his girlfriend's icy demeanour, until her eyes returned to a soft chocolate brown as opposed to the black Dean hadn't even realised they'd become.

If there was ever a clue of her intentions that was it.

They went to bed that night and 'made love'. The next morning Dean received a phone-call that changed his life.

Sam gulped and looked at the clock for what seemed like the 80th time that hour. He'd been up since 5. It was half past eight now. Would Dean be awake now? He never used to be a late riser, but who knows? He had a 'normal' life.

He looked down at the little screen, lit up, resting in hand, the name 'Dean' highlighted. His finger hovered over 'call'.

What if Dean just didn't want to talk to him? He'd been avoiding his calls for around 3 years. Anyone would be pissed. But maybe Dean would understand, he had to clean up his own mess before he could settle down. Not that he blamed Dean for walking away, heck Dean had given more than his fair share, and all Sam had ever done was let other people do things for him.

Sighing he looked down at the screen one last time before pressing call.

Dean was sitting at the kitchen table, it was Saturday morning and he was reading the newspaper, out of habit looking for hunts. Even though he'd given up didn't mean he'd stop looking, he'd just call other contacts if he found anything.

There were a few missing people in the next town over, as well as the anniversary of some founder of a big corporate company's death. Strangely they worked there. Go figure.

His fingers closed around the phone in his left pocket (one for this life in his right pocket, on for his old life in the left) just as it started ringing. Bewildered he brought the phone to his ear, not checking the caller ID.

" 's Dean. Speak to me."

He could hear a gulp on the other end. He frowned at the phone in his hand and noticed who it was that was calling. He was pretty sure his jaw hit the table.

"...Sammy? That you? What's wrong, are you okay?" Dean started to think of all the nightmare scenarios that would make Sam call him when he'd made it so painfully clear he wanted nothing to do with his brother.

"N-no *gulp* I uh. It's just...I wanted to tell you...but uh never mind, forget I called."

"Hey! No Sam wait. 'Sup? Dude I haven't heard from you in forever...I was kinda worried, y'know what the life's like...Where are you? Maybe we could meet, have a beer, catch up?" Dean tried to hide the pain, desperation, almost longing, not to mention enthusiasm, but it would be evident to a monkey.

" Uh, I'm in a small town in Wisconsin...there was a haunting at this old factory, real powerful, trapped people in other dimensions, left their bodies to rot. Thought it was a Djinn at first, but it turned out to be the last...uh never mind. Managed to save a few people."  
Dean tried not to dance, not only was his brother *talking* to him, but he was less than twenty minutes away, and had dealt with the hunt he'd just found!

"Hey, that's great Sammy, I was just reading about it, was gonna call Malcolm Turner for it, but guess you got there first hey? Well I'm the next town over, what motel are you staying at? I'll come meet you if you want?"

Sam hesitated. This was going a lot better than he could have hoped for, but he was nervous. Why wasn't Dean mad? That's just who Dean is, plus he had good reason.

"Yeah...sounds great, uh Red Pinapple," Sam said it softly and Dean could hear he wanted to say something else, but he didn't probe, just letting Sam get to it. "Uh...Dean?"

"Mmm?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"You just did," Sam could hear the smirk down the line, he rolled his eyes "But you can ask me *another* if you want."

"Ugh. Whatever Dean. Just... why aren't you mad at me? I didn't call you back, didn't pick up, barely spoke you at Bobby's funeral, heck *I* walked out on you when you saved the world!"

"Ahhh," Dean said softly, "That's not my style is it Sammy? I forgive and forget. Plus you must have a good reason."

"But, I didn't Dean! I was just selfish, I knew you wanted out, you told me that from when you got out of hell! But the angels just kept shoving more shit on you! I didn't even help, crap I drank demon blood! I knew the second it was over you'd be gone. Plus...it sort of felt like...I don't know, neither of us were gonna say yes, but then you did. Even though you had good reason. Ughh Dean I dunno. How can you even want to see my face?"

"Sammy. I love you. You know that. I always will, no matter what you do or say I'm always going to love you. You're stuck with me until you don't want me. Everyone makes mistakes... everyone has their... demons... And I am sorry for agreeing to it and leaving you alone, but I'm not sorry for the outcome really. You should know me better than anyone else, and you should know I'd never hate you, I'd always want to see you okay? Now, what do you say, 12? I gotta make myself at least a little presentable eh?"

Sam murmured in agreement and sat staring dumbly at his phone for what seemed like forever. Dean had rarely said he loved him, and he'd never said it so freely. Dean had changed and that saddened Sam. But he was excited. He couldn't help it, it was almost like after that time John had made him stay at Pastor Jim's to finish a school year when he knew it was important. Although really Sam suspected Dean may have had a hand in that. When the school year was over Sam had ran, jumped and hugged his brother so hard it was almost embarrassing. But this time Sam was scared too. Scared Dean really was mad, wasn't going to show, or was just going to go to tell him he didn't want to see him ever again.

Still. When those words had left Dean's mouth Sam was filled with something he thought had died a *long* time ago.

Dean hadn't noticed Cassie walk in the kitchen. He stood up, pocketing his phone, still wearing the biggest shit-eating grin he'd had in ages when he turned to a very *very* pissed off woman. He froze. Deer in headlights wasn't even the phrase. That probably didn't help his case.

"That's right you cheating scum I heard you."

"..I... wha?" Dean had thought she was mad about him poking his past with a 10 foot bargepole.

"So you 'love' her do you? I thought you said you 'loved' *me* last night. Well I'm telling you now Dean Winchester, Cassie Robinson does *not* get cheated on. You leave, and you leave now! You can go live with *HER*!"

'THIS IS MY APARTMENT' Dean screamed in his head. Instead he said "Heyy, Cassie, love, calm down." He held his hands up in front of him in a peace gesture.

"CALM DOWN? YOU WANT ME TO CALM DOWN? YOU HAVE SOME NERVE MISTER!" she was about to throw herself at him –and not in a fun way- but he caught her hysterical slender frame easily. Sometimes he felt like she would break if he dropped her.

"Cassie, darling. I was talking to Sam. Sammy, my brother Sam! He just called, that's all, we're going out to lunch. That's all, love, honestly, you know I love you." He choked on the 'love' in his declaration. She probably noticed.

"I...okay. But what? Why? I mean, you haven't seen him in over 3 years right? Right? Or have you been lying to me about that too?" Her voice took on a new venom and Dean knew better than to ignore the 'too'.

"Darling, I haven't been lying to you about anything. And no, he just called right out of the blue. Said he had something to talk about."

"I thought you'd left your past 'behind'. It was a 'one way ticket to self destruction' and you wanted to 'live'. I thought you were sick of 'giving yourself up for other people' that you 'want what has always been just out of reach.'."

"I did and do Baby, you know that. He just wants to talk. I'm done with hunting."

Her eyebrows rose in a 'do I?' but Dean dropped it in favour of a shower.

Sam couldn't believe it. He was actually a girl. What guy couldn't decide what to wear?

He had a shower and *blow-dried* his hair, *shaved*, washed his *all* his clothes and had them spread out over the bed.

Pretty sure he was going to start putting on makeup Sam groaned and face-palmed.

"AARGH!" He shouted to the empty motel room. It was 11:50, and he assumed he'd meet Dean outside the motel entrance since he didn't tell him the room number. He couldn't wait to see the Impala's gleaming black body. "IT'S JUST MY FREAKIN' BROTHER! WHO CARES WHAT I WEARRRRRR!"

Huffing at his own stupidity he pulled on the newest shirt he owned, blue and green striped/squares pattern thing, and shoved on his trusty green jacket over the top. He wrestled his long limbs into Jeans and converse, took one look about the room, grabbed his phone and wallet, and walked out the door, locking it.

He had a few minutes to spare so he walked into the main reception, flashing the nice old lady a smile before getting a Fanta from the machine. He went and sat on the bench in front of the motel sipping his drink.

At the apartment Dean was having a minor heart attack. Okay well that was an exaggeration, but seriously, since when had Dean-freaking-Winchester been *nervous*? Rationally anything could have happened, he told himself, for all he knew, Sam was a demon, whoever called him was a demon, Sam could have changed, could have called to kill Dean, but really Dean didn't even consider that. He just wanted him and Sammy to be okay.

He opened the wardrobe doors, standing in the bedroom in just his boxers, and carefully scrutinised every piece of clothing he owned. He wanted to be *him*, but...frankly most of his clothes had been thrown out. He tentatively fingered his leather jacket, knowing if he wore it Cassie would have a major fit. Eventually he pulled on dark blue jeans and a black button-up, leaving the collar open by a few buttons, and walked through the apartment. He called a goodbye, not really caring if she heard or not, and grabbed his car keys.

As he stepped out of the apartment complex, the sun hitting his features, he flicked his hair to the side, it was getting just that bit too long and a few strands were hanging in his eyes, and walked around to the back of the building, unaware he was being watched. The sight of his baby shining made his heart warm. He didn't care what Cassie thought, he knew the Impala was beautiful.

Dean waved to Casey, one of the guys from the gym on his daily jog, and got into the car, turning on the stereo. He winced as Cassie's 'Robbie Williams ~ Greatest hits' Cassette started playing. Glancing to the left, he saw her little powder blue Prius and wondered why she ever bothered to drive the Impala when she complained about it so much. He sighed and took her cassette out of the player, adjusted the seat backward, because really, who was *that* small, and reached into the little cassette box he kept under the seat, only to be horrified when he found it missing, with just a note- 'you need to update your music collection! Cas 3'. He sighed again and turned the stereo off, putting her tape in the driver's door pocket. For a few minutes he just sat there, letting his knuckles go white as he gripped the steering wheel harder. He *NEVER* did anything like that to her. If he did she'd probably murder him. He's surely entitled to his own music in his own car? And another thing, he *never* called her 'Cas'. It reminded him too much of Castiel.

Once more he sighed and pulled out of the carpark.

A/N Okay so sorry again about the long wait. I know what's going to happen next (shockingly...) since I've already written it...on various scraps of paper...most of which I've lost...uhm. Yeah. Hopefully I'll update again soon.

Anyway as always reviews are appreciated (: As are suggestions/ideas/telling me you can see through this and exactly where the story is going/flames. Hell. Anything. Send me a button. Well actually that would be pretty awesome...Uhm...the point? Yeah I think I lost that ages ago... thanks for reading^^ 3lovelove


End file.
